Courtney: Okay. Well, you’re going to start that. What’s a big piece of advice that our dad gave you?

Dana: I don’t know if it was necessarily advice, but maybe we just modeled behavior. I always felt like whenever, especially like with sports, cause he coached a lot of our teams and stuff, and whenever he watched me play, and I never got off the field and he would just berate me for what I did wrong.

And I always felt like he, he honestly taught me the happy sandwich. Like where the first thing you’d be like, you were so amazing. You did this so well, blah, blah, blah. We would talk about that and the great plays and the great hits and all that. And then I would bring up, well, I did terrible at this point and he’d be like, yeah, that wasn’t great. But here’s maybe how you could improve that let’s work on that next week. And then he would end with like, oh, but that play was amazing. 

You know, like I felt like he always created a safe place for me to explore what I needed to improve on in the world of sports.

Courtney: I think that what I’ve gotten from dad and would it be like a piece of advice or like I don’t, I don’t remember him having any like sage words. I’m sure that he has. His willingness to do anything for our family or people that he’s close to, like, he, it was never a question. Like I never, he’s extremely loyal, extremely loyal person. And I think that I got that from my father is like, I am an extremely loyal person. 

Dana: Yes, it’s so funny. Cause you’ll, you’ll just be with him randomly and he’d be like, we need to figure out how to get here and how to do that when you figure out how to… and it’s always meant, it’s not like trying to better himself, it’s always cause he wants to show up and be valuable to another person. 

Courtney: Like when we were building the Bradford, I think they came up, like, I think they said like 19 times that year, like they would drive from Florida, work for the weekend and drive, and drive back and help us with whatever it was. Like, whether it was like painting or doing trim or planting trees, and he would work the weekend and then drive back. Like he’s very, very loyal person. 

Dana: I guess circling back a little bit too, I loved what her statement that her dad made, that the product of your business is not what you sell, but the story they tell at the end of business with, with you basically.

Thought that was amazing. I think it’s so, so true. So true. And it’s like we, in our sales funnel for all of our companies, that’s the last piece it’s called lifers. Make them lifers, make them lifers, like make them no matter, whoever asks a question on Facebook, who’s the best, your best wedding planner? They’re the first ones who reply because they just, they had the best experience. They want someone else to have that same amazing experience. And I love that. 

Courtney: Because I think it’s so true. Especially when you’re in a service industry, you know, like it’s not necessarily about exactly what you’re doing, but how you made that person feel while you were doing it.

Dana: Yeah. And it kind of like, I mean, piggies back a little bit on what we were talking about, like kind of building that, like creating connections with people. And it’s funny because I feel like that’s one of the things that I do really well with my clients is I always created connections with them.

I’ve, you know, there’s a good couple dozen that I still keep in touch with through Facebook. You know, all that stuff and have that kind of relationship or I’ll like, I remember, I guess it was a couple of years ago. It was like right before the pandemic hit actually, and a mom of a bride, like randomly texted me and said, hey, I saw, you know, Tory’s wedding won an award that someone had submitted for something.

And I was like, oh yeah, blah, blah. That was for this. She’s like, she’s about to have her first baby, her baby showers tomorrow. Do you want to come? I was like, sure. She’s like, I’m not going to tell her, it’s a surprise. And I just got to go there and like surprise her. And it was really neat and it was just, it’s just, those are, it’s just cool.

Being a part of someone’s like life story in that way, like an all these big moments or whatever. 

Courtney: But what about when the story goes badly? 

Dana: And when it goes badly, this I was going to say is, is I’m such a good BS’r. 

Courtney: Cause no, cause I feel like that. I feel like this has bitten you in the butt before, a hundred percent. So like, I, you know, I make a connection enough to like, get the job done. And there’s a couple of people, like maybe two. Clients out of like the hundreds of clients that I’ve had that I even keep up with randomly. And I’m like, you’ve hired me to do this job and I’m going to do this job. And for the most part, it stops there. One of your strengths is making that connection and making them feel like they’re your BFF. And so what happens to, in my opinion, sometimes when it goes badly is there’s emotions that seep into the business and it can go like terribly awry. 

Dana: Oh yeah. No, so the one I’m thinking of is like my worst review I’ve ever had. Her wedding was May of 2019. She left their review in May or June of 2020, which is just ugly and mean. It’s like the whole fucking world’s falling apart. My business is decimated. And you now find the time to write this review?

Courtney: In her defense we all had a lot of time, maybe she was done making banana bread.

Dana: I don’t know. I just, there were lots of theories I have, but she, during the process, I mean, I didn’t mind her. At one point I told Courtney, I was like, her expectations are too high. Like, and she’s intense. Like she’s an intense person. She’s like one of those people that like will tell you what she thinks, but doesn’t care about how she makes anybody else feel. It didn’t come from a place of maliciousness. And I, and I do believe that I don’t think she was a naturally, 

Courtney: It came from a weird place of entitlement. 

Dana: Yes. Very weird. So anyways, and I just played nice. I mean, I did all the things I was supposed to do. I behave the way I was supposed to. She thought we were great friends. And the wedding came and it went and it was amazing and everything ended up perfectly. And she was so happy. Got tons of hugs, tons of texts next day or whatever. And then like two months post, she got her white, her, she got the pictures back and she was upset about her pictures, which obviously I didn’t take the pictures.

She was upset that some picture framed and get put on a chair. I don’t really know which I, there are, there’s lots. There’s lots about this. But anyways, I think what it came down to is I, she thought that we were BFFs and she thought that we were going to be BFFs after her wedding. And we were not because I just, that wasn’t the relationship I wanted to have with her. And it offended her very greatly. 

Courtney: I know, that’s what I’m saying. Like sometimes when you make those connections and people feel so close, they can get very hurt. Oh, I know. So she was like going for the jugular. 

Dana: So then like, this all happened, right? This is COVID or women’s emotions are high.

And, and I, this review came through and I was just live it, like I was pissed. And so I’m like posting on Instagram. I don’t name any names. And, but she sees this post. And so there’s this photographer’s trying to have this conversation between us or whatever. And she told the photographer that it was the meanest thing that she thought that we were closer friends and that it was so mean that I called her mean, and I was like, but you are mean, I mean, like, why are you leaving this one-star review when it had nothing to do with your wedding? Like your wedding was literally perfect. Like everything went exactly how it was supposed to be. 

Courtney: I’m just saying that sometimes there is some benefit. 

Dana: No, I agree. I know that was my point saying like that. 

Courtney: I think her story was not good after. 

Dana: Oh, no, but there’s a line. I think that you have to draw and there’s a line that you cannot cross. And I think if I was to go back and say like, this is where I’m culpable in this whole thing is I crossed the line and making her believe that I felt for her a different way than I actually did. And it’s not like I have to say I don’t,

Courtney: like leading her on. 

Dana: Yeah. Like, I mean, and, and just think about anytime you’ve been led on by anybody, by any relationship, whether it’s a friendship or romantic or whatever, like how hurtful that is like genuinely and so, like, I can see like where my culpability in that is, and I should have just been less emotionally. I don’t know manipulative. Is that the right word for it? I don’t even know what’s the right word. 

Courtney: Well, that would imply that you were doing it intentionally. 

Dana: Well, I was intentionally just trying to be overly accommodating because I was afraid of her wrath. As opposed to just drawing boundaries and lines in the sand and giving her the limit of like, we’re not friends, I, you have hired me to be your wedding planner and that’s all it is, you know? 

Courtney: So yeah. I’m just saying, I think, I think when it’s good and you make those connections. When It’s great, it’s great. But when it’s bad, like it’s really bad.

Dana: So bad. So I totally agree with her that creating connections is the best way to market your business, the best way to sell your business. And I think it’s so important. And like, even in our story, like we just didn’t think we needed anybody else. Like, oh, we’re fine. Just the two of us. And it really wasn’t till the Bradford, we were like, oh, but we need to make some friends, like we need to, like, we need. 

Courtney: We need to have our friends want to have weddings here. 

Dana: It was like, we had to network, you had to create these connections or people like saw the space and it wasn’t because they liked us. It was just putting our product in front of people. And the way you could put it in front of people was to build a relationship with people. 

So, yeah, I think it’s probably the best piece of advice anyone will ever give you is create connections. And I love it that that’s her cornerstone. 

Courtney: Yeah. And I think it’s, it means ever-evolving. Cause, you know, as we go to like a more digital age, like creating those connections socially, like on social media, if someone were to inquire with you, maybe you follow them on social media, respond to a post, let them know that you see them just like they see you.

Dana: But I think it’s one of those things. Like we’ve interviewed a ton of people and I’ve talked to a ton of people and there’s tons like marketers or whatnot. And to me, the ones who really know how to do it well are the ones who and who say that on some level, right, it’s about relationships. Creating connections, and like, even with our venue consulting clients, like when we’re like, what’s your homework, your homework is you need to take 10 people out to coffee. That is your homework. Like make some connections. Get your name out there. Get your name out there. 

Courtney: It was like a cornerstone for her sales strategy was making those connections. 

Dana: And it’s also communicating your value and your value. And I love that too. That’s really hard to do. I struggle with that. 

Courtney: Yeah. I feel like I’m good at that.

Dana: But I have, I struggle with that for a very. 

Courtney: Yeah, I think I’m good at communicating the amount of effort and what goes in to making something happen, but not in a like, pandering way, but in a way that’s like, this is why it costs.

Dana: Right? No. And I agree with that. I think that’s probably why you’re better at sales and I have a hard time. It’s going to sound terrible and I don’t mean it in any way to sound terrible. I have a hard time selling for somebody. Because I have a hard time sometimes finding value in other people, other people, because it’s because, and it’s not because I don’t find them valuable it’s because I have a hard time finding it’s a way of like, almost deflecting how I feel about myself.

Do you know what I mean? So it’s like, okay, like, would I pay this much money for this? And am I worth that? And if I don’t think I’m worth that than why would someone else be worth 

Courtney: so interesting? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, so like when we were selling for our new employees, which are super pumped about I was the opposite, like.

Dana: I got to paint he’s people. 

Courtney: Yeah. It’s not even just that I got to pay federal taxes on them and then they’re going to have insurance. And like, I had better like make some money on this. Like I just, I didn’t see it as is this person worth it? I saw it as, what does my company need? Like, what’s it actually costing me and it’s actually costing our company more to have that person go and do the wedding. So I’m going to charge more. Right? 

Dana: And I’m not saying it’s the right way to think. I’m saying, it’s just, it’s how I am. I. And I felt like I sold well during that time, I 

Courtney: was, I was shocked and delighted, delighted by your responses were very lengthy though. My God, you take so long on those calls. I do, but I had to 

Dana: make the connection, but I think I had to convince them. I got to convince you and then convince them absolutely worth the cost, but it 

Courtney: definitely. I think what that whole exercise in general, it made me realize, okay, this is like the actual cause I just, I look at it as a business and this is the cost of doing business and it is costing me more to have these people do business, which I’m happy about.

Like I’m not, not happy about that. but then also then throwing out some of these numbers and realize that. I am asking these people for a lot of money. So I’m going to have to add more value and I need to be a little bit more transparent on why asking for that. I need to, right. Because it’s costing me more, but this is a lot, those like those two things, like kind of a juxtaposition at the same time. Yeah. But I gave no discount. 

Dana: Yeah, no I’m any give any discounts. I mean, other, we, we always do military the military discount because that’s the fair and right thing to do. But 

Courtney: No, I, I agree. I think, I think what I have a hard time with is I think it’s more on a global scale of inflation, right? Cause when I think when I think back to like where we started and where we are now, it is ridiculous what our day of cost is.

Dana: And we’re not even the most expensive person. And so, and to me it’s like, am I part of the problem of the world? Like I’m continually inflating this cost. And to me, it’s like, okay, if we’re going to, if we’re now going to charge almost three times what we charged 10 years ago, right? Yeah. Three times in 10 years.

That is that’s 300%. That is massive. You’re right. I do need to add some value and that value cannot just be oh, you get me as your event manager and we come in six to eight weeks prior. It’s like, no, like I’m going to give you something that you can use. It’s going to help you get on the right path.

I’m going to give you all these tools. I’m going to give you templates. I’m going to create this process so easily for you, right. As opposed to just being a person and like, and that’s where I had to get to is okay. We do offer a lot. We do provide a lot for our clients. Like we do create a great, you know, service and a great experience. 

It is an insane price. And so like, let’s even like reverse back to like, where we started, what was the market value of what we gave where, do we undercut the market? A hundred percent. So let’s, if we talk about market value of what people were charging, they were charging $1,200 per day of service. We’re charging, we don’t do anything basically less than $3,000 for day of. So even you’re talking about 250% at this point, that is ridiculous. It is absolutely ridiculous. And I’m not saying it’s wrong 

Courtney: Because there’s a lot of work that goes into it.

Dana: There’s a lot of work, but my point is before all we did is we would show up that two months prior and we do the job. We would check your rentals, do your, all the things. And we still do all those things, but now it’s like, okay, now we have this folder that is rich and full of things to make you successful. And I feel like there’s value in that because it’s basically like I’m giving you my brain dump. 

Courtney: Yeah, and everything that I’ve developed in those 10 years, that I’ve leaped from this to this.

Dana: Sure. And now I can like plan a wedding with my eyes closed and I can look at every, I can look at a timeline and say, Nope, that’s not going to work. That’s going to be stressful. It’s you’re not going to be happy with this. Like definitely there is, there is cost and experience. There is value and experience, and I am not discounting that at all.

Courtney: Next, I think she mentioned something I love this is that money is simply just an exchange of value. 

Dana: Yes. I know. I thought that was really great.

Courtney: That was really great, cause it’s not really about the money. It’s not about the dollar. It’s about what people value and people spend money on what they value. If they value enough, they’re going to spend enough. And same thing with anything, like, whether it’s like the Bradford or whether it’s a planning surface or whether it’s like stationary or whether it’s a couch, like whatever you value up to whatever level that’s what you’re going to spend on.

Dana: It’s like, I think Rachel, when she talks about her, when she does her burnout talk, she says, you want to know what you values, see where you put your money. Like, do you value your time? Do you value like your family? Do you value your friends? Like look at where you spend your money and that’s what you value. And it was like such a like, oh, wow. Like that’s crazy when you, and it’s so true, right? 

Like me and Sam spend a ton of money on kids’ stuff. I mean, we spent a ton of money on like sports and like cleats and all the wrap you need for that. And, you know, we find that valuable. We’re about to spend a lot of money on school. We find that valuable. Like, it’s a great exercise to like even reset. 

Courtney: Pretty sure mine is just food. 

Dana: I mean that, yeah, but that’s, I mean, yes. I think that’s the biggest bill that I have. It is one of my biggest bills. 

Courtney: All right. Flipping it all on its, next topic in general is, and I feel like this is a good time cause we’ve talked about this before on this podcast, for a mental health check-in, cause she talked about how her mental health was so difficult. Like so hard. In corporate, she would be in her car crying and, or shower crying, and while she still does have some anxiety, she kind of listens to her body’s cues.

And, that’s gotten so much better, I guess, for her, she said just feeling like she’s in control of that, but we’ve talked about mental health on here before. The check-in time for you. 

Dana: For me? Because you don’t, you don’t have any mental health issues?

Courtney: I do have mental health problems. Sure. 

Dana: Check-in I mean, I think it’s, I don’t, I don’t know what, I don’t know what it is this moment to be truthful. I’ve been trying to find a therapist and it’s been like really hard to find. I had someone at,

Courtney: Even online?

Dana: Yeah. It’s they weren’t, they were the first person I had. Like, she was just like 26. Not that there’s anything wrong with like someone who’s young, but I felt like I couldn’t connect with her in a way that was like, meaningful.

So had a hard time with that and like, she wasn’t married, she didn’t have kids. I felt like, I mean, I don’t know, again, not discounting all those things, but it’s impossible to find somebody because everybody is like therapy, everyone is in therapy. So there is none available anywhere if anyone has any leads, let me know.

 But yeah, I mean, I, I think it, it goes, it ebbs and it flows. I think that there is like, there’s different, I think anxieties and super high the past three months. Cause it’s just been so inundated with work that I can’t get to the end of it, which makes me anxious in general. So that’s, I think been really hard.

I think that like the personal stuff, like when I think about like what got me like super depressed last year, hasn’t been as existent because I haven’t had time to see anybody or to like dwell on that, you know, like and I’ve, I’ve learned a lot, a lot of it go like I’ve just stopped trying. And there’s times in that upsets me that I’ve stopped trying and stopped caring. And then there’s times I’m like, well, that’s just kind of like a great little. Self-preservation, you know? 

Courtney: Sure. I think you got to straddle that line, yeah. But I agree with you at 26. No kids. No. It’s all theoretical at that point, right? Yeah. Can’t really relate. 

Dana: And I know they, there, she was well-qualified and to school and all that, but there’s just something about life experience. I think that gives better advice. And I mean, she was very like on my, totally on my team, like, but that I didn’t really need someone to validate how I felt. I needed someone to tell me am I thinking about this correctly?

Courtney: Call you on your bullshit, 

Dana: Right, yeah. Please call me on my bullshit. Yeah, because that’s what I need, you know? 

Courtney: We can start therapy now. Dana. Now 

Dana: you are not my therapist. 

Courtney: Oh, but how much better it would be if I were.

Dana: How’s your mental health?

Courtney: Oh, God, it’s just been a lot. I think mental health is fine, but like I’ve never processed things really mentally, like in my head, it’s always like in my body and I have had a constant headache for two weeks.

So I’m thinking it must be pretty low. My eye was twitching earlier today, but there’s a lot like between like gearing up for house building and getting our youngest on ADHD medication off the, off the rails, moving Mikael’s birth mother up here, like. So good, I guess? 

Still standing, still standing. But I like how she talked about in the episode, how she kind of listens to her body’s cues. And I think that as I’ve gotten older, that’s been one of the things that’s been really a saving grace for me is to be able to like, listen to what it is that I need and then not cast judgment because I need it.

Do you know what I’m saying? Like, oh, I should be doing, or I should be doing, or I should be doing. Sometimes I just do, and Mikael is actually really good about this. like on Sunday the whole house is just falling down around me and whatnot. And I was like, I should stay here and get through laundry or whatever.

And I was like, but I know Chris is teaching a class and I, I know I’d feel better if I went and did it, but then even just like getting forth the effort to go and do. He was like, you need to take what you need Courtney, he’s like, take what you need. So like once the class, I was like, hey, I’m going to have breakfast with Krista.

And he’s like, you know, take what you need. And I was like, I’m going to go pop over to Lowe’s afterwards and start looking at some cabinets or whatnot. And he’s like, you don’t have to check in with me, take what you need today. You know? Like he’s always been very good about that piece of it. So I think just kind of listening to that, like sometimes I need a nap. Sometimes I need a walk just like her, sometimes I need a drink. Like I’m absolute on none of those things, but occasionally I need all of those things. 

Dana: Yeah. It’s I mean, I think that’s the joys of partnership in life though, is you have someone that you can say these things to, and they’re the ones that help you make the right decisions for you sometimes.

And I mean, I totally feel that like, there’s been multiple times. You know, cause I get, I get super overwhelmed when the house is a disaster and then I have all these other things and then, and I get so overwhelmed that I don’t want to do, I can’t get motivated. I’m not motivated to do it; I won’t do it.

Like I don’t do things out of obligations. I don’t do it. I have to be motivated to do it. And so there’s many a times I’ll be like, oh, I need to do this blah, blah. And he’s like, well, how about we do this? And he’s like, any like lays out this plan. I’m like, oh, that seems like a fair thing to do. You know, and like, okay, like if you’re going to, you’re going to help me do this and we’re going to, it’s going to take 30 minutes.

Like I’m motivated, it’s done, it’ll be off my, you know, my mental plate or whatever the case may be. And it’s always, it’s nice when you have someone that can just kind of push you into what you need to do. 

Courtney: I loved how, when she was talking about, right before we were talking about mental health, she was having a really hard time at all these jobs and she would go from job to job, to job, to job. And if I only had dawned on her that she was the common denominator, it wasn’t all the terrible bosses. Has there ever been a time where you felt like you were the common denominator?

Dana: I definitely think that sometimes, like when I think back to like issues or problems, like going back to like employee expectations. Right? there’s been times I look back and I was like, maybe the problem isn’t the expectation. The problem is me because all of all of these people are failing in their expectations. So to me there isn’t an outlier, and the outlier is me. It’s not them. 

Courtney: Like, have I not set the expectation or the job description?

Dana: Am I not being clear enough? Am I not communicating what’s actually necessary? And I, there has been a couple of times it’s had to take a step back and be like, okay, this is not like an employee problem. This is a management problem. 

Courtney: Oh, I definitely think that often in our business that it’s like, oh, this is a management problem. I think we’re good at hiring people and people are more than willing to do what we ask them to do, and sometimes we have mismanaged or not set the proper expectation. Or even when you set an expectation, but you don’t even like that expectation. You know what I’m saying? Like maybe it could be like office hours or whatever. You’re like, I set this schedule and I hate it. 

Dana: Right, right. No, for sure. What about you? 

Courtney: I don’t know, like mine’s a little like darker, I guess, like when I was having like the hardest time with life in general with Mikael and obviously you in the middle of Bradford construction, I remember really hating how everybody was addressing me. Like everybody was speaking to me and it was all very similarly. And like, I don’t know, like, I didn’t feel not like valued, but like always condescended to, you know what I mean? And then it really did hit me at that point that. The common denominator was me.

Like I was the one that was allowing that to happen. Like I was the one that I was allowing myself to be treated that way. And if I didn’t have respect for myself, how could I have the expectation that anybody else is going to respect me, you know? And especially when you’re around really strong people, I think that’s super important.

It was definitely like a life lesson that I like took to the gut. Like I was like, okay. And that was lots of therapy later that I was like this, this is how you approach me, and this is what’s acceptable. And I’m still that way, like, even in like a heated conversation with Mikael or something, if I feel like he’s crossed the line or is getting too upset or whatever, I’m like, I’m not going to stay in this conversation with you speaking to me like that.

Right. Like I’m just not, and it doesn’t even have to be overly egregious. It can just be what I don’t feel comfortable with, but to be able to like speak up and say like, this is how I want to be treated and respected, I think was definitely a huge life lesson for me. 

Dana: It is a big life lesson. But it’s something like, I don’t think we, you learn until you’re in those situations. And I think that’s one of the things I felt like our parents never really talked down to us. Like they never made me feel stupid or dumb or anything like that. And so I never had to deal with that until when and when it happened, you’re like, okay, well, it was just, how do you deal with it?

Courtney: Like, but I also, I also feel that, in a lot of ways our parents didn’t teach us about agency, like how you’re good. And not like to the degree that this is going to sound like in a socialist way, but it was like your benefit to society was how you could benefit those around you. 

Dana: Yeah, no, I, so my, well, I was trying to say was there was, I remember when the kids were young and. Ada especially had very negative self-talk she struggled with that a lot and she’s still kind of does, but she would make these comments about herself and whether she was joking or not joking with it. And I would say, well, if you called yourself stupid, that means I can call you stupid.

Like, if someone else hears you talk to yourself that way, then that gives them the freedom to talk to you that way. And so that’s not how, we don’t want that essentially. But I just remember thinking, like there was, I never really had to deal with that until it was like full force, like dealing with here, like, oh, wow.

Like this is weird. Like I’ve never been like disrespected in this way. I have been many a times. Mostly by the fathers of brides, but oh But I mean, in the, even in those situations, in the COVID is like you, and I remember that was like, you know, nothing about me. Oh, I know, you know nothing about who we are, what we are, you have no right to make that comment to me. 

Courtney: I know. So disrespectful. 

Dana: It was so disrespectful. And I was like, and all I could think of us, like if this was Sam on the phone. 

Courtney: I know, I thought that all the time. Yes. But you be speaking to them like this? No, no. They just thought they’d get one over on you, there are two women.

Dana: I know. And, and, and the thing that pisses me off too, about it is they would get on the phone. They would be nice in the beginning and they would always make this comment about, oh, two women in business. Aren’t you grateful, you’re so successful? I’m like you’re grateful you’re so successful?

What are you talking about? My gender has nothing to do with my success. Maybe it does, maybe it makes me more successful. I don’t know, but whatever, more adept, more compassionate or bad ass, whatever, either way. It was a definitely that was, yeah. That was a rough season of life. 

Courtney: Yup. Last thing is how she was talking about how before she launched her business, she spent a year getting all the things and all the ducks in a row and all the marketing and all the branding and like how much of a planner she is. And I was like, wow, I’m just like a shoot from the hip kind of gal. 

Dana: Yeah. You are, very much. 

Courtney: Like, oh, we’re going to do this. Now. 

Dana: Yeah, I think that’s where sometimes friction happens too for us, because I think when I think back to like even Anthem House launching, like our ducks were not in a row and that’s what gives me so much, like that’s what made me so like frustrated and the whole process.

Courtney: I didn’t know that I had responsibility for all of those ducks to get them in a row. 

Dana: I agree. I, there was that lack. I am not, I’m not saying there were a lot of things.

Courtney: They definitely weren’t in a row. I mean, for sure, absolutely. Like the, I don’t even know if we had ducks at that point though, they were like eggs.

Dana: Right, right. So, I mean, I definitely think that so like, but I think that’s where I get so frustrated sometimes. Cause I’m, I don’t like shooting from the hip and I think it kind of goes back to, for me, I don’t have a problem letting something go. I just have to know that I tried my hardest before I can let it go.

Otherwise I will always have that what if, and that’s true for anything in my life. That’s true for a relationship. That’s true for a business venture. And so when something goes awry and my first instinct is like, I don’t want to fucking do this anymore. I want to let this go. But then the back of my mind, I’m like, well, you haven’t tried.

You haven’t really tried. You. Haven’t given it a true a true go, like a, true go at it. Right? Like you, you’re just, it’s not, well-planned out. It’s not well-executed. You know, and, and the idea, the reason why you said you were going to do this is because the idea was good. It was a good idea. And so in order for me to let it go, I have to really try it, which is how I feel about our, like anything, like any venture like whether it’s a luxury collection or whatever.

Before we make any moves or decisions, how are we going to move forward with this. We have to really try it. We have to give it 200%. And if it doesn’t work at that point, and it’s not a product people want, then I’m happy to walk away from it and let it go. But until then, I’m always going to be like, what? Yeah. I think it takes a lot of planning is all it does. 

Courtney: And it always shocks me how much goes into making things happen. Like even to the point 

Dana: I really shocking is this 

Courtney: like so shocking to me, like even like, like building a house, like how long it’s taken to get all this back together, or like putting together this e-course like, oh, we’re going to just e-course.

And I mean, I, I don’t really have a lot of mental bandwidth for e-courses, but I was like, how hard can it be? There’s a bit. There’s so many options and there’s so much like connections to like your website to like, this goes to that and whatever, like mind blowing, like things in my mind, they seem so simple.

But then in the actuality I’m like, hmm, what did I just sign on for? Right. But I find myself in that position over and over and over again. 

So, yeah, maybe that’s the way is to become more of a planner. Then I think, I, I honestly believe that if I were that I would plan my way right out of doing something like I would get in the middle of it and be like, I would go nowhere. I’m like, that is a shit ton of work.

Dana: I think a good, healthy mix. And I think she did have a good, healthy mix. She got her ducks in a row. She figured out what she wants. She took a leap of faith in, you know.

Courtney: It was super gutsy, super gutsy. You have 12 consults and be like, all right, I’m going to quit. 

Dana: I know. So there was a little bit of both like a little bit of shooting from the hip. It wasn’t fully planned out, but there was also a lot of planning on the backend. So I think she had a good mix of it. Yeah. It was good. It’s good episode.

Courtney: All right. Moving on to the fuck-up of the week, I’m going to pick mine first, cause it might be yours and I want to take it. 

Dana: What is it? 

Courtney: But my fuck-up of the week was the fact that we had our big industry gala last Tuesday and we had lots of fun. Dana can speak way more to this than I. So much fun. 

Dana: So much fun. I went to bed and my dress. 

Courtney: Yes, she did. And her eyelashes and my eyelashes. 

Dana: Yeah, it was a rough morning

Courtney: but then the very next day we scheduled Instagram live with NACE national that we had to be on. And it was rough. I remember before we got on like Dana and I was like, are you going to fix your face? I was like, what’s wrong with my face? She’s like, it needs a little fixing. I had, like smudge eyeshadows. It was bad. It was bad. I looked like a hot mess. 

Dana: We both did. Yeah, I know. That was not going to be my fuck up for the week, but that’s a good one. 

Courtney: Yeah. It was definitely poor, poor planning. 

Dana: Mine has nothing to do with me. It’s fricking daylight savings time. Oh yeah. Oh God. It’s kicking my ass. Yeah. There’s some pretty brutal and just trying to get the kids to sleep. And I guess another, it goes along with it is we ran out of melatonin. 

Courtney: Oh, you should have come to my home. 

Dana: I know. So I mean, my kids don’t listen to this, we actually give them fake melatonin because they were becoming like, like so dependent on, they were convinced they couldn’t go to sleep without it.

So we bought vitamin C and we just give them half a vitamin C pill and Ada saw the bottle. She’s like, why this isn’t melatonin, it’s vitamin C. I was like, no, it’s melatonin with vitamin C. It’s getting an extra vitamin. And she was like, oh, okay. So they take that. But we do give them the real melatonin when daylight savings time.

Well, daylight savings times, or like when it’s just like necessary. Like I can just, you know, when they’re like seriously struggling. So it was a struggle to get them to go to bed. And so we had the fake melatonin and they were like, this isn’t working. I’m like, ah, it’s probably not. 

Courtney: Thanks everyone for gathering us today to talk about the hustle. For our episode with Lindsay, we are drinking a Cosmo. We hope to get a chance to make it this week and cheers to creating meaningful connections. to learn more and connect with Lindsay you can find her on Instagram at mslindsayjwilliams, and you can learn more about her business by visiting lindsayjwilliams.com 

Dana: To learn more about our hustles, you can check us out on the gram at canddevents at thebradfordnc and at hustleandgather. If you’re interested in our speaking training or consulting, please look us up at hustleandgather.com.

Courtney: And if you love this show, we would be more than honored if you left us a rating and review, 

Dana: This podcast is a production of Earfluence. I’m Dana 

Courtney: and I’m Courtney,

Dana: and we’ll talk to you next time on Hustle and Gather.