When the Corporate America dream job becomes a self-limiting nightmare, with Amanda McKay

Amanda McKay didn’t have a lot of money growing up, and her mom had to hustle to raise 4 kids.  When Amanda pictured her career, she knew she would get into corporate America, work hard, dress nice, and climb the corporate ladder.

But when she finally got her dream job…she hated it and fell into a depression thinking, “is this what I’m going to do for 30 to 40 years?”

If you’re drinking along with us, that means you have a strawberry basil kombucha cocktail.

Amanda McKay is a women’s health and wellness coach based in Raleigh NC.

Transcript

 

Dana: Welcome to hustle and gather a podcast by inspiring the everyday entrepreneur to take the leap. I’m Dana 

Courtney: And I’m Courtney, 

Dana: And we are two sisters who love business. On this show, we talk about the ups and downs to the hustle and the reward at the end of the journey.

Courtney: And we know all the challenges that come with starting a business. Between operating our wedding venue, doing speaking and consulting, and starting our luxury wedding planning company, we wake up and hustle every day. 

Dana: But we love what we do. And today we’re talking with Amanda McKay, a mindfulness-based wellness coach and owner of Amanda McKay health. Amanda, welcome to hustle and gather. 

Amanda: thanks for having me. I’m so excited to be here. 

Dana: We’re so excited to have you.

Amanda: I love what y’all are doing too. It’s fantastic. 

Courtney: Well, we love what you’re doing and by the way, for those of you that are listening today, we are drinking a strawberry basil kombucha cocktail. As always, you can find the delicious recipe in our show notes. 

Amanda: Mine is a mocktail, but that’s ok.

Dana: how far along are you? 

Amanda: 15 weeks. 

Courtney: Oh, that’s exciting.

Dana: You’re at the beginning stages.

Amanda: Yeah. I’m out of the first trimester. So that is thank goodness for that. 

Courtney: I know you’re in like the best part of it. Honestly, like I loved second trimester of pregnancy. Like, you feel all this like energy and like happiness and it’s not uncomfortable yet. So, it just feels very, I don’t know, euphoric.

Dana: I just finally stopped throwing up in the second trimester.

Courtney: That’s true. I was 16 weeks I stopped throwing up, but also euphoric.

Dana: It’s a whole new world.

Courtney: that’s right, but we did not bring you on here to talk about that. But we could, all day.

Dana: But we know from chatting to you a while back that you’re originally in finance, which sounds super exciting. But when did you discover your love for helping others and their mental health and overall wellness?

Amanda: Oh, so I actually discovered that after I started my business, which is really a weird like thing to do, but it kind of led me. I feel as if business a lot of the time leads us to a lot of the solutions we need in our own personal life. It kind of shows us some things maybe we need to work on or some things we’re kind of, you know, struggling with.

And that was what happened for me. I was trying really hard to figure out where, what do I want to do? Where do I want to go? Investment banking? If anyone who knew me would ask, they’d be like, what the heck is in investment banking? Like she’s, this is not for her. It wasn’t for me. And so, I was trying to figure out what can I do?

What do I want to do? What do I like to do? And I knew I liked helping people, but I didn’t really discover or come to that awareness. I was just following things that pulled me. I didn’t have the conscious awareness of, oh, I’m actually a coach. I’m actually like really good at this. And this is something I’ve been doing since I was really young.

I have always helped my friends and family with advice with, you know, things I’ve tried or done and kind of like coaching them through things. I’ve always been very nurturing and very empathetic toward people, and that really encompasses a coach and my coaching practice. And so, it wasn’t until after I started my business that I was like, oh my gosh, that’s like, I’m here because, what led me here was kind of my gut saying, hey, this is something that you really enjoy doing.

And so that recognition didn’t come till after, when, you know, multiple people had to affirm and validate me over and over again until I finally validated myself and I’m like, oh, I’m good at this. I’ve been doing this for so long. 

Courtney: Was it like, you said you found out what your business was going to be after you started your business. So, like, what was the premise that you started your business on? And for finance was it like a hard stop? Like one day you walked in and you’re like, I can’t do this anymore. I’m quitting and I’m doing something else, and there was like a moment of like self-discovery or it was kind of like in tandem and it one just took another path? 

Amanda:  It was a little bit of both. So, I knew I wanted to get out of investment banking, but I was also trying to get into another field and corporate America, thinking I would like this better. So, I actually had tried to get a job at Red Hat in downtown Raleigh for the longest time for like three, four years.

I was applying, I finally got the job and I started and within a month of being there, I was like, this, this isn’t it either. Like I’m not field to do this. I’m coming into work and I’m, they can tell him slacking, like they’ve had conversations with me about how this isn’t, this isn’t a fit.

And I knew it too. And so, I couldn’t go along pretending like, oh no, no, I can, I can pick up the slack. I can make it work. And so, at that moment, like three or four weeks in that job, I had a conversation with my husband and we were like, no, this. This is it, like this has to stop. I’m not going to try to make this work.

I want to do something different. And so, the beginning part of your question of like where did it start? Where did my business start? What did I, immediately jump into? I had always been drawn to the health and wellness space, but I didn’t really understand that I wanted to be like solely a coach. I wanted to teach people things I wanted to maybe hold classes.

I really liked teaching. So, I got my personal training certification and I also got a health coaching certification and I just started there and I was like, we’re just going to learn. We’re just going to start a business, personal training, doing what I can do, teaching people what I know and just run with it.

And that. Growth in my business led to a complete shift that I didn’t see coming into what I do now, which is more like mind, body together type coaching.

Dana: I really love that. And so, I, when I was five, I wanted to be a teacher. Like, that’s what I want it to be. And I never wavered. There was never a point where I thought I didn’t want to be a teacher. I went all through high school, it’s what I wanted to do, I went to college for it. I taught for one year and I absolutely hated it.

And I knew it wasn’t for me.  And I had to stick with it just like, just for personal financial reasons. But, me and my husband talked about eventually, this is not what I’m going to do, but it had been my dream for so long. And it was so much of who I was, that there was almost this period of mourning myself.

And I’m curious if you felt that same way, even with Red Hat, like going after a job for three years, thinking it’s going to be the fix and the ultimate, like what you’re going to love and then realizing no, like, was there a moment of like, I don’t want to say depression, but just mourning that life you thought you were going to love?

Courtney: Or like, oh shit. Like, oh my gosh, what have I got myself into? That’s probably more along those lines of shit.

Amanda: There were many moments like that, but the first one that came, so I had followed this like rational, what makes sense; I didn’t grow up with a lot of money, and my mom was mostly, I mean, I had a stepdad for a long time, but my mom was mostly a single mom with four girls.

And so, I was like, I’m going to make money. I’m going to go and I’m going to do it, what will make me money. I don’t care what that is because that’s the most important to me. So, I went to college for something that I knew was not fully aligned with who I was, but I tried to mold into that role. I was like, I am a business woman.

I’m going to go work in corporate America, and I pictured myself, you know, dressed up constantly walking the halls, you know, working my way up the corporate ladder. Like I pictured that so much for myself, and then my first job out of college, I sat down and within the first few weeks I actually fell into a depression thinking, is this what I’m going to do for 30 to 40 years? 

I don’t even want my boss’s job. I don’t even want my boss’s boss’s job. Like none of those things sound appealing to me. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to do this. So, I continually try to shift. My first job was HR and then I got the investment banking job, and then I got more of like a, stock purchase plan position at Red Hat. 

And I kept trying to shift and trying to figure out, you know, do I like analytics? Do I like all of these things in business, corporate America that I was just not aligned to it in any way? I’m more of like a feeling and emotional and empathetic person. And so Yeah, there was mourning for a really long time that I wasn’t wanting to admit to myself until I finally made that move and was like, I got to pull myself out. I got to do, I got to do what’s best. 

Dana: Yeah, I love that. And I really loved, you said that you did what you thought was rational, because I feel like that is so how a lot of us take that path. And when people, when I told them we were going to be, I was going to quit teaching. We were going to do this full-time. You could see in their eyes, they thought I was being completely irrational.

Like this is a really stupid choice. And so, if you were to look back, do you feel like you’re making an irrational decision or do you feel like it was rational based on what you felt like you mentally needed? 

Amanda: I would say part of it was irrational in the fact that I wanted to go then. I wanted to be out. I wanted to not spend any more time. I mean, I guess that kind of made sense too, because they knew, and I knew that it wasn’t a good fit, so I wasn’t giving them what they wanted and they weren’t giving me what I wanted.

So, luckily, I had the ability to just leave and so a part of that was irrational in that I was so caught up emotionally for not wanting to go back and face that and just sit there in that job with them knowing, and me knowing. And I was like, I just have to follow this. So yes, it was irrational, but the reason I don’t regret it being irrational and following that gut was because it all led to where I am now. Like it was exactly what I needed. It was the pull. It was, I don’t know, just following the feeling brain, I guess, versus the thinking brain and knowing, you know, 

Courtney: So, were there people, like, you kind of touched on this a little bit, but were there people kind of around you at that time that didn’t believe that this was your right path and how did you gain confidence to like, take that leap? I mean, yeah. Obviously like putting yourself through college or having a single mother and kind of going down that almost like security, like as happiness path and then kind of disowning that for the security doesn’t mean as much to me. And I’m going in this direction where there are people around you that were kind of like, what are you doing? 

Amanda: Yes. However, I don’t think many of them really said anything to me. I think that I saw it in the avoidance of me. Cause that can bring out fear in other people. If I’m doing something that is really bold and it’s following my own path and leaving places that they’ve also wanted to leave, that kind of can trigger something in them like, oh shit, like she’s actually doing something that I want to do, or, you know, she’s taking the step.

So, I think the avoidance, I think those people kind of. Stopped showing up and stopped, encouraging me and pushing me on because they had that thing within themselves that was saying like, oh, this sucks for me because this is something that this is just showing me that this is something that I’m not doing. So, but there was nobody that really came up to me and said like, oh, you’re making a mistake. Everyone else was super supportive, and they were like, yes. But I also think that they knew when they know me, or since they knew me that I was not meant to be where I and that this was something that was more aligned with who I am as a person. 

Dana: wow. I feel like that was really amazing. I mean, that’s just like such great insight. I feel like as an entrepreneur, you are sometimes judged harshly and people want to give their opinion. And I think it’s so accurate that a lot of times it comes out of a place of fear, or I don’t know, deflection at the end of the day.

Courtney: Oh yeah, totally. I’ve recently had a conversation like with one of our family members about that, how she was telling me that she felt like, like the world at large didn’t value her contribution because she was a mother. Like that’s what she did with her life basically. 

And it felt like to me, when I’m talking to her, it wasn’t so much that she was worried about other people’s judgment, but it really just kind of sounded like I’m judging myself for that choice that I made. And I was like, cause I really feel like the world at large is pretty open to whatever choice you’re going to make nowadays.

Like whether it’s, you’re a stay-at-home mom, whether you’re a working mom, whether you’re a person working cause you have to work, whether you can’t work and need help during a particular amount of time. There’s a lot of acceptance around those things, but I think the biggest hurdle oftentimes is your own self-acceptance and your own identity and not like casting that onto somebody else. You know, your kind of like work out your own fears through your judgment of other people. 

Amanda: Yeah, every barrier that I had in this whole thing for the past two years has been a belief that I’ve placed upon myself or a limit that I’ve placed upon myself every single time. 

Courtney: Taking us to church over here.

Dana: It’s true

Courtney: Absolutely true. It reminds me of when, when we were building the Bradford, we moved into a rental and Mason was four at the time and Nora was two, and we tried to put them in the same room to go to sleep at night and it just did not work out. Like Nora would not stay in her bed.

Like it was like round robin, round robin, round robin. And she had this pillow that she liked loved. Like she still has this pillow at 10, like obsessed with it. And, finally I was like, if you get out of that bag one more time, like I am taking your pillow. You’re not having it. Like I’ve spoken to you 3000 times tonight.

 So, of course she gets out of her bed one more time and I go there, I’m like, I’m taking your pillow and she’s handing me the pillow and Mason’s crying in his bed. Don’t take that pillow, she loves that pillow. She’s never going to be able to go to sleep like just, you could have my pillow and she gives me the pillow and I put it like in the room and I just hear do do, do do, do do, going upstairs.

And I hear Mason just cracking up and I walked back in and she had just walked to the room and she grabbed the pillow, put it back in her bed was sleeping on it. And I walk in and Mason’s like, I had no idea she could do that. Like, it was just like this moment, like, oh, wow, there’s a work around here.

Like I had no idea that that was even an option. You know, I feel like sometimes it’s like that when you’re like walking down this journey and people are like, I had no idea that that was even an option that I could just go take back that pillow, not be afraid of the consequence. You know what I mean? 

Amanda: Yes. Oh my gosh. Yes. 

Courtney: Okay. Insight. I get a lot of my insight from the

Dana: children,

Courtney: That’s right.

Amanda: can learn a lot from that, 

Dana: Yeah.

Courtney: Yeah,

Amanda: but that’s so true though, that the fear, the fear is felt in our bodies. It is an emotional reaction and response, so it’s terrifying. And so, thinking that it controls us, like, of course that’s a natural thing to want to avoid things that are terrifying or uncomfortable or difficult and not knowing that there’s an option to like, oh, I can actually just feel the feeling and be scared and go do it anyway and be perfectly fine after. 

Dana: So, tell us a little bit about what a coaching session looks like. Like how does the process work?

Amanda:  So, I’m a very intuitive coach. So, I really connect and try to not make a plan for any of my sessions other than the first one, the first one’s always about, where do you want to be? Where are you now and why have you been unable to get to where you want to be? Why do you need it essentially? And most people have an answer for that, which is really cool because then that just answers their own question, you know, and I to move forward with that. But most people know where they want to be if I ask them and they envision it and I, if they don’t know, I make them close their eyes and envision what they want to feel like, what they.

What do they really want? And it’s mostly a stress reduction. Most of the issues that people have as far as like irritation in their days, or it could be as simple as low back pain occasionally, or reactivity to things, and kind of not letting things control you. The fear that we talked about, most of it goes back to how am I responding to my external stressors and trying to control what I can’t control?

How can I release all that, figure out exactly what I can control and move forward toward that and take baby steps and notice the baby steps? And that’s where the mindfulness comes in, if we just pay attention. So, every session after that is Very intuitive. I just kind of ask them deeper and harder questions than they’ve ever asked themselves what they actually want.

 Maybe how and why they reacted to something or what they feel about it.  Things you would kind of journal out to yourself if you were going deeper. And I, I really make them answer it. If they say, I don’t know, we explore that. And we’re like okay, well, what about this? What about this? What about that?

So, kind of see what feels right. And then we match up action and mindfulness to their individual lifestyle, where we can add things into their day. That doesn’t take a lot of time where we can add more joy and more present moment awareness of things. And this has always led to these Epiphanes that they have, they always come to a session to me and they’re like, this happened yesterday.

I cannot believe it and they’ll go on about it. And I’m like, oh, okay. So, like, why do you think that is? And they have their answers. Like everything they needed, they have themselves, they just haven’t done the like inner reflection to find it. They just haven’t had someone hold space for all that emotion, all the difficult things.

And, like how to get through them and how to, how to motivate themselves and find that deeper why for their daily actions, like it’s existential work, but like every single day we’re taking action that leads to what our week looks like, and what our week looks like leads to what our years look like.

And it all adds up. And we’re not thinking that way on a small scale. So, I kind of get them thinking that way and that kind of leads to like more aligned action in their days.  

Dana: It’s not, I don’t want to say it’s like therapy. Because you’re not a therapist necessarily, but it’s like kind of

Courtney: More like a mindset shift. 

Dana: Yeah, like figuring out how to, it reminds me a lot of my daughter. We did put her at therapy when she was younger, cause she had anxiety.  And the therapist was like we want her to just learn how to deal with it, to figure out where, what are her triggers are and how she can get over it so she gets still function. And just like recognizing as she can recognize now, like I’m in a spiral and I’m freaking out about this. This is how I calm down. Sometimes, sometimes she does it and you have to remind her you’re on a spiral. 

Amanda: Yeah. 

Dana: You need to calm down. But, yeah, 

Amanda: Yeah, sometimes it’s just the emotional awareness, or self-awareness, and that leads to emotional intelligence of being able to deal with the hard things. We think that we need to avoid all the difficult stuff, but if we stop resisting them and allow ourselves to feel them and go through them, we get to this other side.

Like there’s no, there’s no avoiding them. We can’t always avoid hard and difficult things. So, it is different in therapy, which I don’t focus on anything in the past, I don’t focus on anything. It’s all present based and future visualization. And I really let them figure out what they already know, essentially, they just haven’t visited. 

Courtney: So, I feel like in this job, you have to be like very understanding and very patient and sensitive to what everyone’s kind of going through at the present, and what’s been the most rewarding moment or memory that you’ve had in your career thus far? 

Amanda:  I would say, I had a client who was going through some health issues, and they didn’t come to me for the health issues. They came to me simply for the stress management. They had always been in kind of fight or flight mode. Their previous job was meant to be in fight or flight mode like they had to be.

So, they were trying to step out of that and get more into the present because they just knew it would help them in many ways. We did not expect breakthroughs with their health. Incredible realizations, not that it solved all her problems or anything, but realizations of getting to the root of her health issues and having that clarity that she needed because the mindfulness she implemented for stress also led to mindfulness in her body’s reactions to things, and being more aware of what triggers it and what kind of harms it or, or what makes it better, and finally figuring out like the root of her health issues. And so that was like a really cool breakthrough. I was like do you see that you did this? You did this, this is so Cool.

Courtney: I know, I think it really kind of shows how your mindset really affects all of you, whether it’s, you know, like the mental, the physical, the emotional, oftentimes it’s just a mindset shift that allows you to change a lot of those things that may be troubling you at the time.

Dana: But I think sometimes too, like to me, I’m a very much in my head person I can rationalize what I’m feeling and I, I can recognize, like, I feel over exhausted even though I’ve had 10 hours of sleep. This is my body telling me something like I’m stressed out and I could all day long, say I need to sit there and meditate, or I need to go work out to be able to get over this hump. But sometimes it’s just hard to do it and what’s stopping me from doing it. Like, why is it that I don’t just get up the extra 30 minutes and do it? Like sometimes it’s like, you can sit there and you can rationalize and you understand it, but for some reason something’s holding you back to not actually the step.

Amanda: And physical habits, there are physical habits and there are mental habits. Like we have these thought trails and these certain things that we do mentally, that we can also follow with. Knowing or being conscious that we’re following it, like overthinking and ruminating and catastrophizing. Those are all mental habits that we have that we don’t always recognize. And physical habits also kind of just take over. It is our autopilot. It’s our brain saying, you know, I don’t want to use this energy right now. So, we’re going to make this like a clear path that I don’t have to think about it. 

And for some people not taking the action comes from a deeper, once they go a little deeper and they, journal about it, think about it, spend time on it, they find that sometimes they don’t take that action because they don’t fully believe they’re going to stick with it or that next time they’re going to be able to do it or that it’s really going to work for them.

And there are like unconscious beliefs under there that a lot of the time are making us think, well, what’s the use? this really going to do? Like, am I really going to stick with this? Is this really going to work? And sometimes we’re not aware of them. Sometimes it’s just that your body doesn’t want to, and it wants to do something else. And you got to figure out what that is.

Dana: It’s normally sat and watch TV. 

Amanda: Exactly. 

Courtney: That’s what your body wants to do. 

Amanda: Hey, we all need it. 

Dana: Oh, I love that though. And I really feel like that really hits on a lot of this past year. I mean, we’ve all like everyone’s going put through the ringer, you know, with pandemic, election season, I mean everything happening.

So, do you have any advice for those of us that are mentally exhausted and possibly just at a road block with their business life? 

Amanda: My clients don’t like to hear it, but learn to be okay being in that block, being in that stress, being in whatever, it is you’re feeling. I have found in my coaching and in my own work with myself that anything that I’m avoiding, like just recently barrier with the course I’m building and I’ve been avoiding finishing this course for so long.

It wasn’t until I finally accepted and said to myself, okay, this is a block. I’m going to admit it to people, my community, I’m going to admit it to my husband myself. And I’m just going to be like, I am struggling. There’s something that is disconnected and this sucks and it doesn’t mean that’s going to make everything better.

It just means you’re being okay with it sucking for a bit, because feelings change. They’re always going to change, and the sooner we accept it and sit in it and feel it, the next thing we know that peak, there’s always a peak. The peak is gone and we’re heading toward a different feeling. And as soon as I admitted that and journaled it out and kind of meditated on it and was like, where is this coming from?

I figured out exactly where the block was and now, I’m amped to go finish that and fix it and do what I need to do with that. And be past that point, like I’m now past it. And I think that has happened with every emotion I’ve had every feeling I’ve had, especially during this pandemic. The more I resist it, the more I try to avoid and get on Instagram and go do something else and not fully accept it.

And as soon as I lean into it, as soon as I start trying to flow with the current versus going against the current. The sooner that that just, you know, starts to fade, like not everything is going to stay, not everything is permanent. 

Courtney: Yeah, I totally agree with that. I’m very much a flow with life mantra and like sometimes you got to press in and then sometimes it’s just like okay to be tired and just act tired and be, it doesn’t have to always be productive. Like I think a lot of times we get really wrapped up in our productivity, being what our worth is and that’s absolutely not the case. Sometimes productivity is diminishing returns, you know, and you’re can be most productive after you’ve had some series of rest. Like I just want to sleep right now with this weather and be super amped and ready when the weather’s nice and you could do things and go out and be productive.

You know, I just, I think sometimes listening to like what your body needs, I think is so important and not judging it for needing that. I think a lot of times I feel judgy of myself for what I’m like, you know what? I just want to sit here and veg out, but I should be doing this and I should be doing that and I should be doing this and no one’s getting hurt, you know, for not doing it. But I feel like I should be, I think you get caught up in those shoulds, you know?

Dana: Yeah. I guess for me the main difference is I don’t look at it as, like I don’t believe my productivity is equal to my worth. I’ve never really bought into that. But what I feel as a business owner is the pressure, because my productivity is dependent on the success of my business or the success of my business is dependent on my productivity, which then impacts my employees. And so, for me, it comes from a place of probably fear of failing, not because I’m afraid of my own emotions of failing. I’m afraid of the people that I love and care about that I employ, you know, me not doing what I said I’m going to do and not helping them become better at what they’re going to do, which is then going to impact my business.

It’s like this really vicious cycle of like, thinking that every single thing I do impacts so many people, and there is some truth to that, but there’s not a lot of truth to that. Right? Like our business would be fine if I didn’t answer my emails to get them down to zero, like it would be.

Courtney: Yeah, my inbox has a hundred and right now. Business is still fine. Still making money.

Amanda: That’s what I find the aligned action is the best type of, like what aligns with exactly what you’re, what the outcome you’re looking for, and not wasting time on the things that you think you should be doing because other people are doing them, or trying to kind of mold into something different or do all the things, but more focusing in like, this is important. This is what my value is and sticking with those values and that alignment really, I mean, how I got right here. 

Dana: Yeah. 

Amanda: Right. 

Courtney: It sounds like you did a lot of aligning. 

Dana: I know but sometimes I find it hard. I really do. I think, especially in a service-based industry to always follow fully my values and have that sounds weird saying that, but there’s sometimes you’re put into positions with a client, and we’re very like open-minded people, like we love everybody, we accept everybody. And sometimes I have to accept somebody that I don’t always agree with and you know, what they think. And sometimes I’m is this aligning… you feel off because it doesn’t fully align with who you are.

Courtney: So, for those of listening, just kind of nearing an end here, what would you say are the most important things to be conscious of and the things that you should incorporate in your day-to-day life for a healthy life, healthy business, like mentally, physically, et cetera. Like what are your pillars for that?

Amanda:  I would say the basic things we all learned, you know, how to take care of our physical and mental wellbeing essentially, those things fill our cup. There are only a certain amount of ways we can gain energy and then everything else we’re doing.

When we’re giving to other people a lot of the time, if you’re not a type of service provider who is fueled by that stuff, you’re probably going to be draining your energy. Me in particular, when I work with my clients, I’m fueled by that, and so after I finish a session with them, or at least I’m on like an energetic high after that, I’m probably using more of my energy.

But that’s when I find most of my productivity is after I have a session, but there are only a few ways we can fuel our energy and that is with, you know, food, sleep, sunlight. That’s really it, that’s really are the ways we get energy. So, taking care of yourself in those ways, resting when you need to.

And like you said, listening to your body, that’s extremely important, or else it may lead to burn out. You know, if you’re not paying attention, and your body sends you signals every single day. When you need to eat, you got to pay attention. You got to spend some time checking in, and I know that sounds really odd to say, like get out of your head and in your body, but that’s really what you need to do.

Step back from what your mind is trying to create for like the future and maybe ruminate about the past. Stepping out of that and actually getting into the now, the present moment and saying, what is my body telling me right now? How does it feel? Do I just need to stretch a little bit? Am I a little stiff?

Do I need to exercise? Do I have like a high heart rate and I need to get out this anxious energy somehow. Just paying closer attention to our bodies because they have so much wisdom in them and they tell us, they give us signals. This is why we get so stressed about things, because our body is reacting. So, I would say self-care honestly, and boundaries can be self-care, saying no can be self-care, sleep is self-care, all the things and putting yourself first so that you can fill your cup and overflow to other people. 

Courtney: I think that’s great advice.

Dana: I know.

Courtney: So hard to work out. It sounds so easy, but oftentimes it’s so hard to work it out in your day to day 

Amanda: Yeah. Working out is one of those things that I thought for the longest time until I became a personal trainer, I thought, you know, I got to burn a certain amount. I got to work off a certain amount. I’ve got to exercise a certain way. I’ve got to do this, this, this. healthier person is just a moving person.

It doesn’t matter if you’re weightlifting. It doesn’t matter if you’re running. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing. My workouts for the past, probably almost a year now have been dancing and yoga. they’re just, you know, in my game room, these are just things that I’m getting movement. I’m stretching.

I want to be able to lift things as I get older. I want the mobility and I don’t need to like put myself in that box of, I’ve got to do this one type of exercise and it can change every single day. depending on my body. So, yeah, it is, it is difficult, but I feel like that alignment again, my whole life clearly is about alignment. Like. 

Dana: well, I’d love that freedom to say healthy people, it’s just moving people, because I do have a lot of associated guilt with like, not working out. I feel like I should work out more and it’s not like I’m trying to get to a certain weight or anything like that, and it’s not even like, I don’t like my body.

It’s purely, I say this all the time, it’s because my daughter asked me and I’m very careful about talking about why I work out, but it’s because I want to live to be a hundred, like, and the only way to do that is to be healthy. We stay healthy. Even during this pandemic, it was important, worked out and stayed healthy so that if, you know, we unfortunately had Covid we could fight it, you know, cause for healthy people.  

Courtney: We have an aunt that’s like 103, so there’s a good chance. great-aunt.

Amanda: Wow. That’s amazing. Someone told me that the key to living a long life, like physically being able to handle it is doing squats, like really not squats, like the motion of squatting when weightlifting, but like squatting as low as you possibly can, like they do in some third world countries, 

Courtney: Oh, we’re doomed.

Amanda: That is an intuitive thing of their body. You need to bend, you need to have the flexibility in your legs and your hips, especially as you get older. So, you can, you know, pick up things and not fall over and not break your hips and break your knees, things like 

Dana: that’s super 

Amanda: so just everyday go in the corner and just stand Scott in the 

Courtney: I don’t know whenever I’m doing yoga, they do like the yogi squat. It’s my least favorite time.

Dana: Maybe there’s a reason why. Maybe you should do it more often. 

Courtney: I don’t know. I don’t

Dana: right. Stop resisting it.

Courtney: not mental. It’s literally my body’s resisting it. Um,

Dana: well this has been so, so, so great. I’ve really, really enjoyed chatting. We have like a whole page of things that I just, I don’t know. I feel like I was in a coaching session today. 

Amanda: That’s what we want. 

Dana: Oh man. 

Amanda: That’s awesome. 

Dana: Yeah. Yeah.

Courtney: Are you accepting other clients now and whatnot. So do you want to say, uh, talk to her, we’ll

Dana: with you if they want to learn more about your business and learn more about you? 

Amanda: Yeah, absolutely. You can find me on Amanda at Amanda SEMA. K on Instagram, all one word. My website is www.amandamckayhealth.com. And I am accepting one-on-one coaching clients right now. I also have a course coming out, hopefully soon, for people who want to implement mindfulness for stress and they want to do it kind of on their own time.

It is a weekly guided course, but they’re prerecorded so they can, you know, on their own. I wanted to reach more people that way. So, that’ll be coming out soon. And I also do speaking events. I hold workshops, journaling workshops, stress reduction workshops, things like that, and speak on podcasts. Of course. 

Courtney: Yeah,

Dana: That’s awesome. Yeah. Well, thank you so much for being here today. It’s been wonderful.

Courtney: It’s been great. Thanks for your time.

Amanda: Yeah. This has been so great. 

Dana: Thanks everyone for gathering us today to talk about the hustle. To learn more about Amanda McKay, visit amandamckayhealth.com or follow her on Instagram @amandacmckay.

Courtney: Okay

And about our hustles visit C and D events.com. The Bradford, nc.com and hustle, and gather.com or follow us on Instagram at C and D events after the Bradford, NC and at hustle and gather. And if you like this show, be sure to subscribe and leave us a rating.

Dana: This podcast is a production of ear fluids. I’m Dana

Courtney: and I’m Courtney.

Dana: and we’ll talk to you next time on Hustle + Gather.

Full Episode Transcript

Hustle and Gather is hosted by Courtney Hopper and Dana Kadwell, and is produced by Earfluence.  Courtney and Dana’s hustles include C&D Events, Hustle and Gather, and The Bradford Wedding Venue.

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